Ah yes, so some time has passed… yet again… since my last post.
The work situation is still… unresolved… but for the moment I am employed, and insured, and therefore I am still skating. I will continue to skate until someone tells me I can’t, and that’s that.
Anyway… I have had some ups and downs on my path to the coveted Zebra Stripes; but I’m trying my damnedest to learn from the downs (and the ups, really), and move on. Don’t dwell on the “needs improvement”s, and don’t wallow in the “great job”s.
>Two weeks ago we did skating assessments, I believe the way it was worded… if we didn’t pass something don’t be too worried about it; but I don’t know if they were the skating assessments required to become an eligible referee. I did well on everything except the 25 [laps] in 5. Yes, I am disappointed, and frustrated, and annoyed. No, I’m not going to give up just because I fell short (5:14).
I started my trial, and the “fatigue” pain in my left knee re-appeared and I had to stop. I rested for the remainder of the 5 min to let the folks skating finish their trial… took off the knee brace I was hoping would help, tried to stretch and warm up the knee a little more, and tried it again. I finished, but I was in pain (which suspiciously faded to annoying ache by the time I got home). Something about the way I was leaning into the crossovers was causing serious pain. I skated through it; but I’ll admit it… I was whining and crying about it.
I was mad. I didn’t want to give up… again. I could hear Captain Bayne’s voice in my head from 20 years ago saying he was disappointed in me because I had a good pace for my 1.5 mile run and just gave up at the end. I know I can skate well, and I wasn’t skating well, and I couldn’t skate the way I knew I could skate because it hurt and the pain frustrated me.
>After a couple of scrimmages and open skate nights, I’ve decided to go back to my R3s and shelf the Dashes for awhile. They don’t fit right; I can’t get the lacing snug enough to keep the skate from sliding around my feet without cutting off circulation or cutting across the “bend” in my ankle. I also discovered that I have too much play in the wheels on my left skate (coincidentally the one with the fracked up truck). I took the nut off, and saw that the axle was too narrow for the bearing (Bones Reds). The other skate was fine; but if I tightened the left one enough so that the wobble was gone; the skate didn’t roll well… and I almost fell trying to do my crossovers because the wheels weren’t spinning right.
I also tried a couple of combinations of inserts to try and remove some of the play around the heel/Achilles tendon… and the fact that skating for more than 10 minutes makes my left heel hurt. So I tried the sports inserts I bought for my fencing boots a few years ago, I tried a rigid arch support insert, I tried gel heel caps, I tried the gel heel caps + rigid arch support… nothing worked without causing some other kind of discomfort or downright paint.
This has made me quite annoyed, because I’m basically shelving a $130 pair of skates because they aren’t working out. Glad I didn’t splurge on a $300 pair of skates that don’t fit… I am convinced that the ill-fitting and crappy truck-bearing skates had an effect on my 25 in 5. I’ve since switched back to the R3s, and while I have to get used to the laces/straps adjustments again; I already feel more comfortable.
I may throw the outdoor wheels on the Dashes, I may try to discover the magical combination of tweaks that make them functional again, I may just say “fuck it” and see if someone want’s ‘em.
>I have asked one of the Refs to act as a Mentor for me… a somewhat dedicated person I can go to with questions, maybe offer some advice or guidelines, etc. I think it’s residual to having the Don(a)/Cadet relationship; only not so formalized or demanding. This isn’t to say that I won’t be asking questions from the other Refs or anything like that; but it is someone besides our Head Ref that will be getting my constant questions and emails, etc. He said this will be a learning experience for him too, so maybe this will be a good arrangement all around.
>Tonight, I am smiling because I had moments this weekend where I truly felt like a Referee. I went to the Saturday Scrap at ACRD (Syracuse), and I did Outside Pack Ref again.
At one point Otto was going to each OPR and offering tips or asking how they were doing, etc. When he came to me he smiled and said, “I don’t need to tell you anything, you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to… you know what you’re doing.” A little later one of the jammers pulled a Minor Elbows during the 1st pass, and I signaled it in like I was trained. Only, the Jam Ref didn’t see it. Otto did catch it, and confirmed it… so it wasn’t a wasted call. The Jam Ref even said that was something he needs to start being more aware of; keeping an eye out for the OPRs while the Jammers are in the pack.
There was one call where I hesitated, and I shouldn’t have because my first impression was the right one:
O>Black Blocker is in the pack and focusing on getting in position next to an opposing blocker. Black Blocker is somewhat small, and tends to swing her arms high forward and back while skating.
O>White Blocker moves up behind Black Blocker, looking for a hole to snake through and into position.
O>Black Blocker isn’t aware of White Blocker moving directly behind her, and during one of her high back swings her elbow connects with White Blocker’s face.
Now, my first instinct was to call the High Block; but then I recalled the wording of the Elbows penalty and what the Black Blocker was doing coincided with the description. I thought about it too much and didn’t call anything… fortunately the ref at Turn 4 called Black Blocker out for an Elbows Major and she went to the box. After consulting Reflmao and Psi’d Kick, my first call was the appropriate one.
I’m a little bummed about that… but by the same token, I am pleased because I was looking in the right place at the right time. I am following the pack just like we practiced a few weeks ago; focusing on the Jammers going through the pack and then back to the pack once the Jammers break free. I’m getting better at gauging when I need to take off to stay with the pack for as long as I can. I’m watching the pack more and the floor around me less, so my peripheral field of vision is widening.
I am actively accepting that it happens in stages… first I learn how to skate… then learn how to skate well. Then I have to recognize what’s going on on the track and deal with it if needed. Then I have to articulate it… and add hand signals. And then I have to be able to back it up (whatever call I end up making).
I have drifted into “seeing penalties happen.” This pleases me. Saturday night, I felt like a referee… not a n00b, not a poser, not a wanna-be… but a referee. Otto was once again full of praise and encouragement, and again said I was welcome back anytime, and mentioned a RCRD/ACRD Bout coming up in the Fall. Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’ll be skating as ref by then ;) I had a shit-eating grin on my face for most of the ride home from Syracuse, and I had the silliest thought that had me cracking up, “If Derby had a face, I’d so be making out with it.”
>I finally went back to a Coach aTOMic practice. I concentrated on doing half of what he was doing; or doing it at a slower pace, or substituting a similar action to what he was doing… so that I was still moving; just not at the breakneck pace he was setting. I decided that, “If we personify Derby, then Sun AM practices are “Derby’s obnoxious sibling you can’t stand, but you tolerate it because you love Derby.”
[I should mention that it is 9:44pm and I am quite literally drifting off at the keyboard, so I should probably find a good stopping point and end it, LOL
Also, if there are a plethora of odd typos, that would be the afore-mentioned falling asleep]
Also, if there are a plethora of odd typos, that would be the afore-mentioned falling asleep]
>Rules Test on Tuesday. I don’t know how to study for it. I’ve been running through the practice online test (based on the older rules set) during work… I’ve been reading through the rules… I haven’t been able to fully sit down and do my “cliff notes summarizing outline” like I normally do when I’m studying. I will do what I can, can’t ask for more than that. If I miss the passing grade… then I study harder and try it again… just like a Microsoft Test (only much less expensive or a pain in the ass to take).
Just like aTOMic’s workout, it’s time for me to improvise, cut back, and take a mildly easier approach until I’m better prepared. Obsessing about the Rules Test isn’t going to make me pass it; it will just give me an ulcer. I do what I can, when I can, and if I fall short; then will more or less know what I need to do for next time so that it will be a non-issue.
With that thought, I desperately need to find my bed and pass out in it!
Roller Derby, I <3 U 4-EVER ;)
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